My Harem Is A What Harem: Ultimate Edition!
by Mumei Mu
Summary: "HOLY..." Kakashi dropped his jaw at Naruto's harem, "THEY'RE...?" "Yup, all my wives." Naruto scratched his head with a sheepish laughter. "...HOW!" "It's a long story." Naruto shrugged, "But we need to get everything ready and we're pretty tired. See you later." Kakashi just watch on as countless wives of Naruto walk past him before he kneel over out of shock.
1. Naruto Have A What Harem!

**I present you one of the latest MHWH series, My Harem Is A What Harem: Ultimate Edition?! A crossover between Naruto and X-overs!**

 **Originally, I was going to involve this chapter and other story in mass update but something come up and it force me to change the plan…Let me explain…**

 **The reason why I'm planning a mass update is because I'm going into a temporary hiatus in order to focus on my youtube projects and I don't know how long it'll take since I'm planning to make roughly fifty to hundred videos first to cover a year and few months in advance (Planning to update weekly).**

 **That was my original plan but few days ago, I kinda got recruited by a friend for his game project. Just brainstorming and nothing else. He know that I'm always imaginative and make up a lot of things for stories (Beside fanfiction, he don't know about them). He offers to teach me few lessons with game developing and I can't say no to free stuff and that would benfit both of us, he'll get a helper and I learn something new that I can follow one of my many dreams…So…With setting Youtube channel up and working with his project, it'll be pretty busy time for me.**

 **Because of that, I'm putting up a poll in my profile for the update and it will end in about a week. So please check the profile as soon as I put it up…Before you vote, read the poll section in my profile for clear explanation.**

 **Special Announcement: From now on, please check my profile frequently for status or any change.**

 **That is the ninth and final installment of MHWH series and before anyone ask, it's AU and different from first MHWH story but you will see some similar scenes from other story. In this story, Naruto will end up with a mass harem and guess what? It's ALL of females! EVERYONE, involving Naruto girls for example! (No mass genderbender, I repeat, no mass genderbender) It's merged with all MHWH harems and many more that are not involved. Yes, there will be some unique OC and semi-OC in that one.  
**

 **Unlike most MHWH stories, it will take place AFTER and about everyday life of Naruto's struggle with his ridiculous huge diversities harem! You think having a large harem is awesome? Think again! I highly recommend you to save this story for later if you don't want to be spoiled by anything because some will be carried over from other MHWH series.**

 **How he ends up with them, I'll leave that to your imagination.**

 **Most of his wives will have hyphenated last name so remove his last name from their name if you plan to look any characters up…But there will be semi-OC and OC characters from other MHWH stories (I'll let you know if they are OC if you haven't read some certain stories). Oh! And most dead characters are alive (It's an AU and fanfic, go along with it.)**

 **Warning: May contain spoilers (Story and harem members for a certain fic) and many contents (From normal stuff to taboo).**

 **A little more details about this story in bottom AN.**

 **Most characters might be OOC but I'm trying my best.**

 **Enjoy the first chapter of MHIWH: UE?!**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or anything mentioned in this story.**

* * *

 **Chapter 1: Naruto Have A What Harem?!**

* * *

"Naruto, here's the mission reports." Shikamaru entered the hokage office with stacks of paper before he raises his eyebrow at the sight of Naruto snoring on sofa, "…Wake up, Naruto, it's almost afternoon."

"Gimme two more hours…" Naruto muttered in his sleep, "Go away."

"But you still have to finish paperwork." Shikamaru glanced at towering paperwork, "It has to be done by four."

"I'll use kage bunshin." The hokage grunted tiredly and his advisor gives out a sigh.

"Troublesome." Shikamaru placed the report on his desk, "Why are you tired in morning? Did you stay up late…" He paused, "Never mind, I don't want to know…"

"It was a game night." Naruto waved his hand lazily up in air, "I was playing a new game board that Roka-chan come up with and everyone join us so it went on for a pretty long time…" He sighed, "Thank kami for kage bunshin."

"Which wives are you thanking?" The lazy genius asked.

"Dammit, Shikamaru, that was just a figure of speech." Naruto sit up with a glare.

"Anyway, you're tired because of a game night?" Shikamaru drawled.

"…N-No, then we end up playing strip version and…" The blushing hokage rubbed the underneath of his nose.

"Stop!" The lazy genius held his hand up to him with paled face, "I do not want to know. I do not want to hear anything about what you're doing with my mother!"

"Oh, sorry." Naruto scratched his head with a sheepish chuckle, "I forget I'm married to your mother."

"Honestly, do you even keep track with your wives?" Shikamaru deadpanned with twitching eyebrow.

"Hai, I do." The hokage replied with his hands up, "It's just that I'm too tired to think straight right now." A yawn escape his lip before he cover his mouth, "Just let me nap for a bit." He lied down, "Run along, sonny."

"If you weren't married to my mother, I'll…" The grumbling advisor walked out of his office with twitching eyebrow.

"Love you too, son." Naruto hollered back with a jokily smirk.

* * *

After his nap, Naruto was able to finish everything early and he decides to use free time to read a book while eating his ramen. A creaking door snaps him out of his reading and the blonde look up to see Asui-Uzumaki Tsuyu with a wrapped bento in her right hand. "Hello, Naru-kun." Tsuyu gave him her unique smile as she approaching his desk, "I would ask you about your work but I see that you're done for the day."

"Hai, can you keep it a secret?" Naruto rubbed his head with a light chuckle, "I don't want to pissed some girls off if they know that I stayed in office after business."

"Mmm, it depends." Tsuyu plopped down on sofa, her long tongue flick out to her cheek. "What do I get to keep your secret?"

"Um, anything you want…" The hokage stared at his wife as she unwrapped her bento, "Beside sex in office. I almost got caught the last time you come here…" 'Like everyone else.' He thought, Naruto don't know why most of his wives like to do it in his office during the daytime."

"Relax, you make me satisfied last night." Tsuyu turned to him with crossing arms on her chest, "Until you want to go another round with me, you perv?"

"I-I-I-I'm not pervert!" Naruto stuttered with red face.

"Liar." The slouching girl teased as her husband tried his best to calm himself down before she tap her chin, "Let's see, what should you do for me?" She changes her seat from sofa to Naruto's lap, leaning her side against his chest with bento on her lap and she look up to him. "Give me a little peck and feed me."

"I can do that." He gave her a quick peck on her forehead before he starts to feed her with chopsticks as she snuggles up to him, "Are you getting using to your new home?"

"Yes." Tsuyu ate sausage from his chopstick with a tiny nod, "It has been seven months so I'm used to Konohagakure by now. Of course, the technologies and techniques play some part in that." She think about some certain technology that was created from fusion of few energies before she look into his eyes, "What about you?"

"Me?" Naruto raised his eyebrow.

"Are you getting used to your ultra harem?" Tsuyu's tongue flicked out with index finger on her chin.

"I-I'm getting there." He wrapped his arms around her waist as his chin rest on top of her head with a sigh, "I still can't believe I end up with so many wives…"

"Over thousands." Tsuyu hummed, "I heard of 'love knows no bounds' but this is ridiculous." She gazed at him, "You're a super loveable perv."

"I'm not a one." Naruto muttered.

"You are." She smirked, "After all, you have an ultimate harem, ranging from loli to grannies, human to interspecies, your family members from mother to daughters, good to evil, A to Z…"

"I-I-It's not my fault I end up with everyone." He cut her off with embarrassing blush before he gives her a look, "And I have to point out that you're a pervert too. I mean, you like to keep doing this thing with your tongue."

"And you enjoy it, you perv." Tsuyu giggled.

"…E-Eat up." Naruto offered her another piece after few moments of silence.

"Mmm, by the way, we're going to have theme tomorrow since it's first day of week." She took a bite.

"…Oh, log-sama, no…" He tilted his head back with a shiver, "W-W-What kind of theme is it this time?"

"It's not going to be naughty maid theme since we already did that last month." Tsuyu said, "Maybe it's going to be something that we haven't use for a while."

"You know what'll it be so please tell me…" Naruto pleaded with her, "Give me a hint, I need to steel myself for tomorrow."

"Nah, you know the rule." Tsuyu's tongue flicks his nose lightly, "You can't know anything about the theme and it's always surprise."

"And yet, you or anyone kept telling me when it comes up." He muttered under his breath, he can't handle the theme because they always wear certain outfits or do something crazy and he still don't know who start it in first place. 'I bet it's Kaguya.' Naruto guessed.

"Still can't figure out how it all starts?" The slouching girl spoke up as her husband blink rapidly at her, "It's written all over your face."

"Ah, yeah." Naruto sighed, "I remember the first theme, it was so right out of blue. To this day, I wonder who was the one that starts it all…Along with harem." He gazed at her, "Do you?"

"Nah." Tsuyu closed the now-empty bento, "Toru, Mina and Ochaco told me about it and I went along with it because it sounds like fun." She tilted her head again with finger on her chin, "I told few others about it."

"Is that so?" He scratched his cheek lightly, it sound like a chain letter and he may have to follow it all way back to the original…But that would take days, courtesy of his ultimate harem.

"Say, you're going out with your friends tonight for a drink, right?" She stood up, brushing her skirt down.

"Yeah." Naruto nodded, "I won't be back home until about nine." He gazed at her, "Do you want to join us? I'm sure the guys won't mind it."

"Nah, I was told to remind you not to overdo it." Tsuyu replied.

"Let me guess, Chichi?" The blonde shinobi sweatdropped.

"She's not the only one." She smiled with her eyes, "I guess they don't want to repeat the incident from last time."

'O-O-One time and they never let me live it down.' Naruto rubbed his temples with a deep sigh, receiving a small giggle from his slouching wife.

"I'll be going now." Tsuyu gave him a wave as she left his office, "See ya later."

"Back at you." He called out to her before he resumes his reading for few hours.

* * *

"I saw a hottest babe at a store and I was about to introduce myself to her…" Kiba smashed his mug on the table as his friends shift away from him to avoid spray spill from his drink, "Until I saw the fucking Uzumaki wedding ring!" He direct his glare at his hokage, "How the hell did you land this babe, you motherfucker?!"

"Um, I have no idea what you're talking about." Naruto said slowly at loss for words. "Which one were you talking about…"

"I don't know, she looks like a hot model with nice tits and ass." Kiba grumbled, "Redhead."

"…I get some good guesses on whom you're talking about." The blonde hokage rubbed his head before he give him a dirty look, "Please don't perv on my wives or I'm gonna beat you up then tell your mother and sister about it when I get home."

"You motherfucker…" Kiba's eyebrow twitched.

"That's a fine fitting nickname for dickless." Sai smiled, "After all, he fuck his own mother and mother of others." He cup his chin with a nod but everyone just ignore his comment like usual.

"Boss is so lucky." Konohamaru sipped his drink through straw, "I wish I have a hugeass harem of wives."

"Same here." Kiba agreed, 'Minus couple types…' He doesn't say it out loud or risking Naruto's cruel pranks and his wives' wrath.

"Um, I'm very blissful to be loved by many but there're some cons to that." Naruto scratched the back of his head.

"Oh, like what?" Choji asked curiously, munching some chips.

"Where can I start?" The hokage hummed with crossed arms, he doesn't know what to start with.

"I know!" Konohamaru snapped his fingers before he point at his boss, "Some have same personalities and it feel like you're dating same person over and over. Am I right?"

"No, not at all." Naruto shook his head, "While they have some similar personality, everyone has different likes and dislikes and we both make effort in our relationships…"

"Ah, it's your fembot wives!" Kiba spoke up, "You can't get it on with…"

"Finish this sentence and I'll put you on D-rank missions for five years." The hokage's eyebrow twitched, "Not all relationship is about sex. It's communication and efforts." The shinobis don't know that it's possible to have intercourse with fembots but…'There is no way I'm gonna tell them about my love life.' Naruto rubbed his forehead with an exhaust.

"Why don't we start off with something easy like…" Rock decide to speak up to stop other from guessing, "Dere types? Like Tsundere and Yandere."

"…How you know these terms is still beyond me." Sasuke deadpanned at the green beast.

"At first, I always get confused by the girls who are Tsundere and still do because…" Naruto thinks back to some recent events.

* * *

 _Naruto spot Aisaka-Uzumaki Taiga leafing through some magazine on couch and he tiptoe up behind her with a wide grin before he wrap his arms around her in a hug as he kiss her cheek. "Hey, hon…" Naruto laughed before she suddenly ram his face with the back of her head._

 _"Don't do that, baka!" Taiga screamed with hand on her kissed cheek as her husband roll around on floor, clenching his nose. "You just scared me! And w-why did you kiss me for? I'm not in mood for whatever you're thinking about!"_

" _S-S-Sorry, I won't do th…" Naruto muttered before the palmtop tiger suddenly saddle him with a red face and closed eyes as she puckered her lips up timidly._

" _B-B-Be gentle, darling." She whispered and he stared at her puzzlingly with a small sweatdrop before he kisses her, only to receive another headbutt._

* * *

The group stares at him as he lift two fingers up, "For yandere…"

* * *

" _Thank for your help." Naruto waved at a secretary as she left the room with paperwork and he turn around, only to cry out frightened at a sudden appearance of his two wives with chilling expression. "Y-Yuno-chan? A-Ayano-chan?" He took few deep breaths with hand over his heart, "You just scared me. What bring you two he…"_

" _Who's the bitch?" Gasai-Uzumaki Yuno cut him off, "She's not one of your wives or anywhere on the love list."_

" _Are you cheating on us, senpai?" Ayano hissed and Naruto sweated at a rusted kunai in her hand, "Do I have to kill this bitch?!"_

" _No, no, no!" Naruto waved his hands at them, "I will never cheat on my lovely wives, you know me! She's just a secretary and she has no interest in men!" They stared at him for few moments before beaming grins and blushes break out on their faces._

" _He call us lovely, hehehehe." Ayano cupped her face happily, swaying her skirt around._

" _Of course, you're always loyal and faithful to us." Yuno giggled giddily, "Please forgive us for suspecting you, honey."_

" _Y-You're forgiven…" He released a breath of relief as his yandere wives gush to each other. "…Wait, what's love list?"_

* * *

"…W-Why did he marry these girls…" Shikamaru shivered to his best friend and his response was a simple shrug.

"Kuudere…" Naruto flicked his third finger up before Kiba stop him with a wave.

"Okay, I'll give you this but I still don't see any problem with that." Kiba muttered.

"Newlywed stage." Shino suddenly spoke up, "Very affectionate wives."

"Huh?" Almost everyone turned to him puzzlingly before Kiba raise his eyebrow at him, "What do you mean?"

"You're right." Naruto muttered, "When I get home, one of my affectionate wives greet me with kiss…Then other one want to receive a kiss…" He blushed with several sweat beads on the back of his head, "And next one and next one…" The blonde glance at Shino, "But I don't understand what you mean by newlywed stage."

"Because the other day…" Shino started his story.

* * *

 _Shino browsing through the goods in grocery stand in a market street and he spot Naruto walking by. He rise his hand up to say hello but a cheerful voice rang out, drawing the hokage's attention. "Darling-kun!" Naruto turned around to see a lean buxom woman with long pink hair running up to him with a shopping bag in right hand and many people can't help but to gaze at her large breasts that juggle with each step, her tight dress leave nothing to their imagination._

" _Oh, Kyouko, my sweet honey!" Naruto grinned silly as Kyouko clasped his hands with hers, shaking them lightly in silly fashion. "Are you shopping?"_

" _Yes, it's my turn to cooking tonight." Kyouko singsong, "I got some fresh eels for unadon and I'm gonna feed them to my beloved darling. It's best for stamina boost."_

" _My adorable honey is so thoughtful." The hokage singsong as he pinched her cheeks, the tip of their noses rubs each other. "I love you, my sweet honey."_

" _I love you more, my darling!" She cooed and they kept going on and on, never notice how their behavior affects the people around them as they shy away from the couple. Shino can feel goosebumps break out all over his body from watching them._

* * *

The group, minus hokage, cringed at the story before Sasuke turn to his rival, "...Wait, aren't you married to her for four years?"

"Hai, but how is that a bad thing?" Naruto tilted his head with crossed arms.

'It's embarrassing to watch you acting like that with them in public.' Almost everyone share their thoughts as they recalling seeing him with some certain girls.

"Now think about it, I can see some cons to that…" Choji hummed.

"How?" Kiba looked at the chubby shinobi, "Like what?"

"It can get a little confusing because some have same name." The Akimichi heir said as some agreed with him, "Managing times with individuals without having some issues and many more."

"Managing was a little tricky at first but thankful, I have the best manager and kage bunshin goes long way." Naruto chuckled.

"…Fine, fine, you all win." Kiba threw his hands up, "Mass harem is good but it has a lot of cons."

"Like the fact that some of your wives are sworn enemies." Shikamaru drawled and they look at him odd for a moment. "Did you forget the battle between Batgirl and Harley the other day?"

"It was a spar." Naruto said.

"Naruto, this 'spar' destroyed fourteen stands, send five people to hospital and cost hundred grand ryo in damages." The lazy genius deadpanned at his hokage with everyone else.

"…" The hokage remain silent by sipping his drink, gazing away from the group and they decide to change the topic to spare Naruto for now.

* * *

Naruto walk toward to a large gate to a modest Japanese traditional house and he step through the gateway, a shimmer can be seen when he walk through it. He grins at the sight of a giant unique one-story traditional house, surrounding by several buildings, a giant hot spring and massive fields with some hills. It took a lot of work to build them and at same time, creating a link between a separate dimension and many dimensions around the world by integrating many reality-altering techniques and abilities together but it pay off in the end. Naruto step onto porch and he enter the main house as he remove his shoes. "I'm home!" He called out in case if anyone was near the foyer and Grayfia walk into his view with a basket of dirty laundry.

"Welcome home, Naruto-sama." Grayfia bowed to him before she turns away from him.

"Fia-chan, drop the sama." Naruto sighed at his maid-wife and she turns her head to him with blank expression.

"Naruto-sama, you know I will not drop the honorifics until I'm off duty." She said, "Give it up."

"Never." He shook his head as he approached her, "I'm not gonna stop asking you that until you do." He attempts to steal a kiss from her but somehow she saw it coming and stops him with index finger on his lip.

"I'm on duty, Naruto-sama." Grayfia spoke, "Please do not try to cause any inconvenience with me or any maids on the duty."

"I'm not gonna make some troubles…" Naruto muttered, he still don't know why some of his wives want to work as his professional maids and sometime, they would give him some mixed signals when they were in mood for a quickies or tell him not to do anything when they're on duty.

"Good." She turned around to walk away with swaying hip, "I'll give you a reward later after my duty if you don't."

"I'll hold you on that." He smiled, it was her way to tell him that she'll make it up to him. He walk few steps before several young teenager girls and women tackle him down, demanding for kisses and hug. 'Why does it always happen every time I come home?' Naruto stumbled back up on his feet with a tiny sweatdrop before he gives his wives their kisses and hugs.

* * *

Naruto put his pajama on in his bedroom and he sit down on his cal-king bed with a small yawn. "I wonder who'll sleep with me?" He said absentmindedly. While his kage bunshins sleep with his wives, six would sleep with him for a night then switch with other group the next night and they'll shuffle the rotation after everyone have their turns to mix things up. But it's different on Sunday because everyone sleep with him in a unique giant bedroom, something that still puzzled him to this day but he decide to let it slip since everyone's okay with it for some reason.

"Naru-nii!" He looks up to see his twin sister, Natsumi, enter his room in her orange pajama before she hop onto his bed, crawling toward him as she lick her lip with a foxy grin. "Wanna do a little quickie before the other sh…"

"Don't think about it, Natsumi." They both looked up to see their mother as Kushina walked in her skimpy red negligee and her daughter let an groan out. "Some complained about the dirty sheets because you can't control yourself."

"We were gonna do it on the floor." Natsumi muttered before she perk up, "Until we can go for mother-children threesome…"

"Not this time." Kushina lied down at her son's left side, "We promised Naruto that he'll get a few days off if we ever did something big like last night, remember?"

"Ugh, stupid promise." His twin plop down on her back before she roll to Naruto's right side, snuggle up to him. "…Can onii-chan give me a good-night French kiss?"

"Sure, Natsumi-nee." Naruto bended his head down to catch her lip in a heating French kiss and he break it few moments later.

"Can mommy has one too?" Kushina asked before she kisses her son with tongue for few moments and they hear a giggle at foot, causing them to look up to see Ayano in her loose black pajama.

"Senpai is so naughty." Ayano giggled crazed.

"Crap, Yandere-chan is gonna sleep with us." Natsumi deadpanned as the homicidal schoolgirl eagerly crawl to her husband and she immediately make out with Naruto in a very heated fashion, causing Naruto to flailing his arms around for few moments until she break it with string of saliva between their mouths.

"I love you, Naruto-senpai." The homicidal schoolgirl snuggled on his chest, inhaling his scent deeply with few sniffles.

"I love you too, Yan-chan." Naruto chuckled lightly at her and she blush happily at her nickname. Once again, the door swing open and he glance up to see Carmelita Fox-Uzumaki in her loose white t-shirt and a blue panty as she approach the bed with wide yawn. "Long day?" He asked with a tiny smirk.

"Yes, it was because Selina and Felicia decided to have a heist competition and the other took part in that." Carmelita climbed onto his chest next to Ayano with a exhausting sigh before she plant a kiss on his lips.

"Did you catch them in the end?" Naruto asked curiously.

"What do you think?" The foxgirl deadpanned and he assumes that she didn't get them by the tone of her voice. He open his mouth to say something but a exciting shout cut him off and he look up before his face turn red as Arahabaki-Uzumaki Nonko strut up to their bed in her birthday suit with Ravel, wearing a plain nightgown, in tow.

"Ya-hoo!" Nonko leap on the bed and her blushing husband adjusted his gaze away from her bouncing breasts as she crawl with some stumble, he can smell alcohol. "Wanna fool around before we go to sleep?" Naruto barely get a word out as the drunken oni suddenly make out with him before Ravel pulls her off him.

"Please don't do that." Ravel deadpanned, "Naruto-kun is still exhausted from last night, Carmelita too because of her job today and you're too drunk to think straight. I do not want to lose another night of sleep because you can't control yourself like…"

"What are you talking about?" Nonko lifted her gown up to reveal a orange lacy panty with a giggle as the blonde devil yelped out in embarrassment, "You wanna fool around too since you're wearing his favorite underwear."

"T-T-T-That's not truth!" The blushing devil quickly pushed her gown down with a shakily glare as Naruto's red face become more redder, "I-I-I'm wearing it because that's all I have left!"

"Liar!" The oni laughed sillier, "I saw you picking it out from the drawer, mumbling something about trying to get p…"

"GAH!" Ravel covered Nonko's mouth with her hands, a smoke exploded from the top of her head.

"N-Nonko-chan, you should listen to Ravel-chan and go to sleep." Naruto grinned nervously, trying to ease it up before someone finds out that…

"Ah, senpai's junior is poking me." Ayano giggled with heavy pants and his body stiffened up as they look at him with different expressions.

"You have boner right now?" Natsumi smirked at her brother.

"N-N-No, I…" Naruto tried to deny it but he feels someone grab his crotch.

"Oh, my, you do." Kushina smirked at him, "We better take care of it."

"W-Wait!" He gulped nervously, "C-Carmelita and Ravel don't want it because…"

"Suddenly, I'm not tired anymore." The foxgirl sit up with a purr and he tried to say something but Ravel suddenly kiss him, forced by Nonko before they all jump him.

'Dammit, I just want to sleep!' Naruto cried a river of tears as they tried to strip him down.

Whoever said harem is great really has no idea what he's going through and how hellish it can be sometime…

* * *

"N-N-Naru-kun, w-w-wake up. I-I-It's almost afternoon." He felt someone shaking him in his sleep.

"Good grief, they wear him out again." Naruto recognized their voices as Hyuuga-Uzumaki Hinata's and Haruno-Uzumaki Sakura.

"What time is it now?" Naruto muttered sleepily as he slowly sit up, rubbing his eyes.

"A quarter to eleven." Sakura replied.

"Is th…" The blonde slowly trailed off as soon as he opens his eyes to look at his wives before he notices their choice of attire with a raised eyebrow and faint blush. He recalling Tsuyu's statement yesterday about the theme starting this week. "…I-I-Is it swimsuit theme?"

"Y-Y-Y-Yes." Hinata's face lit up like a tomato, she wear a white string bikini that barely cover her privates and she was trying to cover herself up in vain as her body tremble in embarrassment.

"Naughty swimmers to be exact." Sakura muttered embarrassingly, she wear a very skimpy pink bikini with g-thong

"A-And high heels?" He glanced down at their shoes, Sakura and Hinata wear pink and white stiletto heels respectively.

"I-I-It's o-optional." The pink-haired kunoichi turned her red face away from him, "C-Come on, get up and take a sh…" She feels his hand grab her wrist and she slowly look at him to see a familiar glint in his eyes as he also grab Hinata's wrist. "R-Really?" She gives him a look, "You want to make it three days in row? Kami, you're so insatiable…" Sakura release a squeak as Naruto pull them into bed and he roll over them with a lewd grin. "Naruto! Don't you dare…" Moans break out within the bedroom.

It's wonderful to have an ultra harem!

* * *

 **And that end the first chapter of MHWH: UE?! Love it? Hate it?**

 **Detail: Again, that is an AU and merged of all MHWH series, plus many characters that are not involved with any stories as you have seen in this chapter. It take place after the trip/marriage, you can say it's kinda a story after epilogue in a way. You will see a lot of characters pop in and out or mention someone and at same time, you will see some moments, problems or whatever going down within the ultimate harem.**

 **What kind of things will we see next? Who'll make appearances and will we get spoiled by some certain things if anyone decides to read this story first? Let's find out next time!**

 **Reason why I can't write (Blank) harem: Yandere harem…It's pure bloodbath because they won't share Naruto, due to their 'he belong to me' mindset and there's no sane person to talk them into sharing.**

* * *

"Hey, Yandere-chan." Naruto walked into a red room and he pause with a blink, since when did he have a red room?

"Hello, Naru-kun!" Yandere character smiled cheerily as she hugged his arm, "Do you want to go out on a date with me?"

"Sure." He grinned before he look around, "Where's everyone else?"

"Oh, they decide to leave us, something about going home and thank you for helping them out." Yandere character lied with a charming smile, secretly nudge a decapitated head under sofa.

"Ah, is that so?" Naruto hummed as she lead him out, "It's a shame that they don't say bye to me before they go."

"I know!" Yandere character nodded her head, hiding her twisted smirk. Naruto belong to her and no one else!

* * *

 **If you like that 'Why I can't do blank harem' section, I can make more of that with each chapters until I run out of material. Give me anything and I'll give you my option with a example.**

 **I think that's all I can say for now…Thank you for your time to read it.**

 **Please leave reviews and feedback here. The flames will be tossed into boiler.**


	2. The What Council

**Thank you for the reviews and feedbacks.**

 **That is not part of mass update but a small bunch of update because few things have come up during my writing and I want to let you all know so you all won't freak out if you didn't hear anything from me for a while. Don't worry, I'm still working on mass update first before I go on hiatus.**

 **Let's start with something easy…(MHWH news only) A lot of people have been asking me for lemons in MHWH series when I didn't mention anything about it in any stories and I actually said it was far away from my mind when I start these stories and I'm not sure about that because of many contents and I'm not really into these stuff if you know what I'm saying? I wrote these stories to poke some fun at it and try to make it more like comedic harem mangas (Something like Negima or To-Love-Ru). I still get same questions more than you think it does. I'm still not sure about that so I decide to put up a new poll up for a stand-alone lemon story (Kinda like WDL:What If) and it will closed on September 30.**

 **Second, while I'm writing on weekdays, I will take weekend off from Saturday to Sunday from now on for personal reason. Nothing bad!**

 **Third, um…Ohh, that kinda sound a little bad for some people…Um…I'm going to announce my semi-retirement. What is Semi-Retirement? The detail will be explained in my profile so go and read it.**

 **Um, other than these, I think that's all info for now. Enjoy a small update!**

 **Special Announcement: From now on, please check my profile frequently for status or any change.**

 **Some questions can't be answered to avoid spoilers and if I miss any, sorry!**

 **Daemon: I didn't eat any fruits…I'm just one crazy guy with too much imagination and boredom.**

 **Warning: May contain spoilers (Story and harem members for a certain fic) and many contents (From normal stuff to taboo).**

 **WARNING: NSFW chapter due to 'girl talk' (Talk about sex) and some contents. (Just saying it for some people.)**

 **This chapter was partly inspired by Fukumaden, a manga. It's kinda seinen and I don't know why they tag it yuri for some reason. Anyone who has read this manga will know right away when they see a certain scene.**

 **Most characters might be OOC but I'm trying my best.**

 **Enjoy the second chapter of MHIWH: UE?!**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or anything mentioned in this story.**

* * *

 **Chapter 2: The What Council?!**

* * *

Kurosaki-Uzumaki Yuzu scrub her body in a largest bathhouse that almost resemble an indoor hot spring and a blissful giggle escape her smiling lip as she think back to morning when she wake Naruto up. "Ooh, it has been two weeks after Naughty swimmer theme and my ass is still sore." Yuzu glanced over her shoulder to see Kim Possible-Uzumaki sit down in water with a small wince as she knead her buttocks.

"Ah, I know how you feel." Mito-Uzumaki Ikumi, known as Nikumi by some people, touch her breasts with a small flinch, "He won't stop abusing my tits with his cock over and over." A airy laughter draw their attention to a very busty loli with crown on her head.

"Look at you two, complaining about sex." She laughed at them, "You can't last few rounds with Naruto-kun? No wonder why he fuck everyone so much." She pointed at herself with her thumb, "I lasted ten rounds and booooy, my body was so sore for weeks but you never hear me making one complain!"

"Mercedes, not everyone have stamina like you and Naruto-kun." Nikumi deadpanned at her.

"Or horny all the time, begging Naruto for another one every single day." Kim shook her head, "And to think you were a princess."

Yuzu turn back to her wash with a light giggle, they tend to complain about it and yet they enjoy it…A thought occur to her and she glance down at her body then she glance at the other women in bathhouse before she look up with tilted head. "I wonder if Naruto-kun has a preference?" Suddenly, everything become quiet to her confusion and she glance over her shoulder to see that everyone was looking at her oddly. "O-Oh, did I say it out loud?" She blushed.

"Yes, you did." Gogo Tomago-Uzumaki blew her gum out before she pop it back into her mouth, "You know he don't have one or otherwise, he won't have an ultra harem with..." She gestured at some women of various types in bathhouse, "Various types from loli to grannies, human to whatever they are."

"I-I-I know but that's not what I mean…" Yuzu stuttered with red face, her hands fidget with towel on her thighs.

"What do you mean?" Kim asked.

"Um, I-I-I was thinking if N-N-Naruto has a preference…" Yuzu blushed heavily, "I-I-In bed." Again, everything becomes quiet for a while.

"…O-Oh…" Nikumi coughed into her fist awkwardly, "…Y-You mean like body type or any part?" The loli girl nodded shyly, "Um…I think he prefer breasts? He always does titfuck all the time with me…"

"No, he's more like ass man." Leshawna spoke up from other side, "He kept fucking me in anal when I told him not to."

"No, it's legs." Arachnera-Uzumaki Rachnera smirked, "He said it himself."

"No, no, you're all wrong." Imp stood up, "He truly love oppai loli!"

"Ha, we know he's into flattie." Etna laughed airily and the group start to arguing over who was right until Mercedes speak up with a smirk.

"Why don't we just do a survey?" Mercedes said.

"…A survey?" Nikumi blinked at her owlishly with everyone.

"Yup, we give everyone a survey on…" The loli princess tapped her chin with her index finger, "How many cumshots do we get from Naruto-kun in private or personal time?" Private or personal time is a codeword for one-on-one with their husband in one of private rooms without worrying about someone come inside to stealing him away for a round. "We'll put down all our body measure, cup, etc."

"Oh, that's good idea." Gogo cupped her chin, "…We should add body type and species like teenager monster girl for example."

"Right!" Mercedes pointed at her, "Then once we collect all survey from everybody, we should call for a meeting with Wives Council and share the result!" The group start to discussing about their survey and Yuzu stare at them in background with a small sweatdrop.

* * *

"How many cumshot have you receive from Naruto in your recently private time?" Trixie Tang-Uzumaki poked her cheek with pencil in deep thought before she write it down with a smug smirk, "Ten."

"Ten?" Paulina snickered, "I got twelve."

"Pfft, thirteen here." Lois Lane-Uzumaki walked past them and the teenager and young girl look at her back with blinks.

"…Fifteen." May Parker-Uzumaki write her answer down and they slowly turn to her in shock.

* * *

"…When was the last time I have sex with Naruto solo?" Daisy Johnson-Uzumaki wonders until she remember, "Oh, sixteen."

"Whoa, that's almost same like me." Wendy Marvell-Uzumaki blushed at her, her index finger barely cover her lip.

"Really?" The inhuman looked at her, "What's yours?"

"…S-S-Seventeen." The wind dragon slayer dipped her head down out of embarrassment.

"Damn, girl!" Daisy whistled at her, taking pleasure in teasing her.

* * *

"Eleven times." Penny smirked at her two closest friends as if she was bragging, "What about you?" She takes a sip of her favorite wine.

"Seventeen." Amy Fowler-Uzumaki said in between giggles and the blonde woman spit her wine out.

"Dammit, I made him come fifteen times." Bernadette Rostenkowski-Uzumaki grunted.

"What the hell?!" Penny stared at her friends in shock, what did they have that she doesn't have beside higher intelligence?!

* * *

"I hate it when he comes all over me." Tigress marked twelve down, filling some questions out. "Do you have any idea how hard is it to wash dried cum off your fur?"

"And yet, you let him do that every time." Renamon replied as she writes ten on her paper.

"Be glad it's not scales." Celia Mae-Uzumaki run her hand through her snake-hair after she wrote fourteen down, "They would get stuck in between and start to smell for a while if you don't wash them out in time."

"Right…" Uzumaki Miia glanced at her snake lower body with blush before she answer her survey with thirteen.

"It's hard to be monster girl and anthro sometime." Lola Bunny-Uzumaki wrote fifteen with a sigh.

"Indeed." Judy Hopper-Uzumaki nodded, answer it with eleven.

* * *

"I was able to receive eighteen shots from him during intercourse." Karakuri-Uzumaki Chachamaru filled her form out calmly but you can see a pink tint on her cheeks.

"It might be very satisfaction for you two." Jocasta spoke, "Naruto has come sixteen time during our sexual intercourse and it was very satisfaction in our case."

"C-C-Can we please stop talking it out loud?!" Hermione Granger-Uzumaki shot her eyes at them embarrassingly, "You're in library and everyone can hear you!"

"Oh, seventeen?" Hestia peeked at Herminone's paper out of curiosity, "How did you do that? I only have thirteen. What's your secret?"

"N-N-None of your business!" The flustering bushy-haired wizard covered her paper with another paper, "What I do with our husband in private time stay private!"

"Girls…" They turned to face Sona Sitri-Uzumaki as she faces them with stoic expression and crossed arms. "Be quiet." She turns around to walk away, some sneak a glance at paper in her hand and they see number eighteen on it.

* * *

"Ten…" Mabui hummed before she glance at Hinata, "What about you?"

"T-Twelve." The blushing hyuuga squeaked out.

"Oh, that mean I beat you." Himawari smirked, "Dad comes inside me fifteen times."

"H-Himawari!" Hinata looked at her daughter from the future with widened eyes, "Don't say that!" The daughter still smirks at her.

"Natsumi-onee-chan, how many times did you get from Onii?" A young redhead looks up to Natsumi. She appear to be around twelve years old, she have long wavy red head that reach to her bottom and blue eyes. She wear red kimono top with black short pant that stop above her knees, black legging and she was barefoot, due to the fact that they were in one of living rooms.

"Eighteen." Natsumi winked coyily, "What about you, little Mito?" This girl is her and Naruto's little sister.

"Mou, I did fourteen." Mito Uzumaki pouted childishly.

"Don't worry, you're still young." The old sister patted Mito's head, "Just give it some time and you'll be better like your onee-chan."

"Hai, Onee-chan!" Mito perked up cheerily.

* * *

"The council meeting is now in session." Kusajishi-Uzumaki Yachiru hammered her gravel with a smile as the hammering sound echo throughout a largest stadium with overwhelming numerous females. The stadium is actually a largest stadium building, one of Uzumaki's clan houses, and the females decide to use it as a meeting spot for Wives Council since it was only one of few places that can hold everyone. "Mercedes will take the floor." The smiling loli hand the gravel over to the said loli princess.

"Thank, Yachiru." Mercedes cleared her throat as she face her fellow wives while a large monitor lower down, "And thank you all for filling the survey out. The reason why we suddenly send everyone a survey is because very few of us realize that we do not know if Naruto-kun has a preference in bed."

"Oh, that's why you ask us about our body and how many times Naruto come?" Rachel Roth-Uzumaki arched her eyebrow.

"Yup!" The giggling loli princess nodded, "We have to consider everything from body size to race, involving our body appearance and type. Once we received the completed surveys from every one, we study the data." She gestured to the monitor as it showed a datasheet, "If you take a look at your pad thingy…"

"Tablet." Alia muttered.

"Tablet, you will see list of names and number." Mercedes said, "We discovered that the minimum and maximum are ten to eighteen per personal sex and for his preference…He doesn't have one."

"Ah, you're right." Asama-Uzumaki Miya scrolled down the list, "It's all over everywhere."

"So it really doesn't matter anyway." Kagurazaka-Uzumaki Asuna huffed, "After all, if he have one, he won't have a ridiculous huge harem. That is totally waste of our time." There was some mumble and chatter until someone speak up.

"Hold on, I think we're missing one." Kurosaki-Uzumaki Karin raised her hand up.

"Eh?" Roll EXE blinked at her before she quickly scan the list, "…She's right! We're missing someone."

"Who is it?" The blinking loli princess asked.

"My sister, Yuzu." Karin said and everyone immediately turn to the said girl with 'deer caught in headlight' expression.

"Yuzu?!" Mercedes looked at her with tilted head, "You don't do the survey after starting the whole thing?! Did you forget?"

"N-No, i-i-it's not something I should share…" Yuzu waved her hands at them.

"Aw, are you shy about it?" The loli princess gets closer to her with microphone, "It's okay, they don't mind it if you have less or more than them. Come on, dish it out."

"I-I-I-I…" The blonde Kurosaki covered both sides of her flustered face, her eyes peek out between her pinky and third fingers as a small stream come out from top of her head. "F-F…" She mumbled so lowly.

"Mmm, how many?" Mercedes shove microphone close to the blushing girl's mouth with a smile.

"…F-F-Forty-two!" Yuzu burst out, "Forty-two!"

"…K-Kage bunshin don't count as it stated on the paper." The loli princess held a paper out with laughter.

"N-No, it was really forty-two times with just him alone…" Yuzu covered her face and everyone stare at her in astonishment. How in world did this little girl managed to receive this many cumshot from their husband?!

"…W-W-When?!" Mercedes gaped at her.

"T-T-T-This morning…" Yuzu muttered through her hands.

"…What were you wearing?!" The loli princess bombed her with questions, "What did you do?! What's your secret?!"

"I-I-I only wear my underwear and wake him up by dry-hump him…" Yuzu muttered, "T-T-That's it! I swear!" It was calm before the storm in the stadium.

"WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?!"

"IS SHE HIS FAVORITE?"

"WHAT IS GOING ON?!"

"HOW DO I MAKE HIM CUM INSIDE MORE THAN THIS?! TEACH ME!" Most females went crazy and kept shouting question after question, trying to figure it out. At same time, a certain girl glance at her tablet then she come up with a theory.

"HOLD ON, EVERYONE, QUIET DOWN!" The voice shouted over and like a magic, the chatter died down as everyone look to the owner of voice, revealing to be Coco Bandicoot-Uzumaki. "It might be a theory but I think I figure something out." Coco cleared her throat before she turns to a person next to her, "Tali, you had sex with Naruto on this day, right?" She pointed at a date on paper.

"That's right." The Quarian nodded, "And I remember seeing you come inside after I left the private room about ten minutes later."

Coco nod, "You received fifteen shots from him, correct?" The alien nod slightly before the furry girl turn to the group, "If you look at my data, you'll see that I got fourteen cumshots and that's one less than Tali."

"…Oh, that's right!" Lucy Heartfilia-Uzumaki gasped in realization, "Nami, Maleficent, Yachiru Ophis and I had sex with Naruto on same day."

"Which mean it really depends on Naruto's stamina and whoever go first get more on a day?" Ankha hummed before she frown, "But that still don't explain why Yuzu produce so much today."

"I can answer that." Coco said, "When I looked at all dates, I found out that Naruto had sex with everyone in row without a break. The last one was four days ago with Rias…" She gestured at the said redhead devil, "And Yuzu had sex with him this morning, which mean he had four resting days. Because of that, his testicles produce high amount of semen. That's why Naruto was able to ejaculate forty-two times with Yuzu."

"…Everyone better hold off for few days." Tharja spoke, "I want to be the first one to bear his children."

"No, that will be me." Oboro shot a dagger at Tharja from her right eye and an electric spark break out between their eyes and the females start to fight over whoever would go first after the resting days.

"Order, order!" Yachiru bashed her gravel as the clamor died down right away, "That's enough. Have you forget that we set up a rule stating that no one controls sex because it can happen random at anytime. Remember what happened when we tried to set up sex rule at first?"

"…Y-Yeah, he can't keep it in his pant…" Ravel blushed, "And some nymphos didn't help out one bit."

"Right." The loli shinigami bobbed her head before she clear her throat, "We will close the survey discussion now and move on next subject. Our next subject is…" She glanced at her clipboard, "Share a kinkiest story." Some women nearly choke on their drinks, "Saotome-Uzumaki Haruna will take the floor because she proposal it."

"Thank!" Haruna grinned lopsided, "I figure since we had survey, we should dish it out with kinkiest story. If someone wants to share what the most kinkiest thing you did with Naruto-kun, feel free to tell us…In detail!" She glanced at the blushing audience, "I will ask some people if no one want to step up."

"Um, is it relating to private time or apply to everything?" Someone asked.

"The latter." Haruna replied, "I'll start! I made one of his kage bunshin to take picture of me, Yue and Nodoka getting gangbanged for my doujinshi references." She suddenly pull a remote out then click it before a graphical image appear on the giant monitor above her and almost everyone blush heavily with widened eyes while several women fainted right away. "In this slide, we have Nodoka begging for bukakke and you can see Yue getting spitroast in background while I…"

"HARUNA!" Nodoka slammed her hands on desk with heavy streaming as her perverted friend clicked several times, "D-D-DON'T SHOW THEM THIS!"

"D-D-Damn, girl…" Asuna stared at shy girl, "You're way naughty than I thought…"

"And that's my kinkiest story." Haruna giggled wickedly, "Who want to go next?" No one say anything, due to shocks from seeing these pictures. "…Alright, let's hear it from Snow White."

"Me?" Snow White-Uzumaki gasped out, "Oh, dear…I'm not sure about sharing something personal…"

"Aw, don't be shy." Haruna smirked, "No one here will judge you for something. After all, we already had seen everything on the Marriage Night and regular Kage Orgy."

Marriage Night was referred to a night where everyone slept together with Naruto for the first time. Normally, some people assume that the blonde shinobi slept with someone before this night but in reality, he didn't lose his virginity and everyone were fighting over whoever go first through the whole trip as the harem grow at this time. One day, someone realize that the trip was almost over and they would reach Naruto's hometown in a couple weeks so she somehow talk everyone into doing a certain activity and that was reverse-gangbang and it really don't matter who took his virginity as long as his first time was with everyone. Somehow it seems to work out and everything was blurry this night but everyone remember this night as the Marriage Night because it confirmed their marriage to Naruto for good. They would celebrate their anniversary with either Kage Orgy, where Naruto team up with his kage bunshins, or reverse-gangbang.

"W-Well, since you put this way…" Snow chew her lip lightly for a moment before she give out an sigh, "A-Alright…Um…" She digs around in her head for a kinky story until she find one, "Before sex, I went to the magical storage where we keep these age pill jars and took one deage ball then I gave it to Naruto…"

"Oh, a shota sex?" The doujinshi artist hummed as the princess nodded timidly, "That's kinda common since some are into it."

"That's not the story…" Snow shook her head, "Um…Then I told him to make six clones and…" Her face turned atomic red, "I-I-I got gangbanged by seven shota Naruto."

"…Lucky bitch!" Yukihiro-Uzumaki Ayaka slammed her right hand on desk, "Are you telling me we can do that if we asked Naru-kun?! After all the time I made him shota before sex?!"

"Wait, you didn't think about doing that before?" Asuna deadpanned at her friend and self-proclaimed shotacon.

"…Not until now." Ayaka muttered embarrassingly, sitting down. "I'll do it tonight since it's my turn to sleep with him."

"A-Anyway, that's my kinky story and I don't want to share more details about it." The blushing princess muttered and Haruna was about to say something but…

"Ooh, I want to go next!" Nelliel Tu-Uzumaki waved her hand animatedly and the artist gives her a green-lit. "I made Naruto use me like a cock sleeve in my loli form, me facing him and ceiling and have him walk around hand-free! It was so thrilling!"

"…What's cock sleeve?" Sally the rag doll asked puzzlingly before Zelda whisper into her ear and a shocked gasp escape her lip. "Oh…Oh, my…"

"Same with me but facing down." Yachiru giggled and almost everyone glanced between the loli shinigami and green-haired hollow.

"I like to share my story." Lala Deviluke's hand shot up in air, "The kinkiest thing I ever did is having sex in antigravity chamber." She giggled, "I remember one time he did it with three bunshin."

"…W-Wait, you used my invention for your sexual pleasure?!" Bulma dropped her jaw, "Lala, I even sold that thing to our Space agency for research and some people are flying in it right now!"

"Don't worry, we washed it after." Lala singsong and the bluenette scientist facepalm in disbelief."

"I got a good one." Ryona clapped her hands together with a smile, "I went to a private beach with Naruto-kun and Shiki-chan for our date. About two hours later, Shiki come up with a idea for a fun and she told Naruto-kun to make a lot of bunshin and place them under henge as strangers…"

"Right!" Shiki giggled, "We pretend that we were at some public beach and fool around then give his henged bunshin a show before they jump us in one biggest gangbang."

"Ooh, I still feel the tingles in my body each time I remember how they abused our body like a toy." Ryona moaned with trembling body.

"…Please ignore the perverted masochists…" Ayane looked away from them with deadpan expression, "Can we please stop sharing these stories and focus on something else?"

"Not yet, we need to hear few more stories." Haruna smirked slyly at lavender-haired kunoichi, "Wanna share one with us, Ayane?"

"I-I rather not." The kunoichi crossed her arms.

"…Ah, I guess the most kinky thing you did with him is just Kage Orgy and boring normal stuff." The artist sighed as Ayane's eyebrow twitched, "No wonder why he like Kasumi better, she might be so fun in bed unlike you…"

"I'm not boring!" Ayane shouted, "I forced Naruto's bunshin to fill my bathtub with their semen while fucking him then have him shove me in it for a bath!"

"…"

"…"

"…"

"…Oh, kami…" The lavender-haired kunoichi's body become full-on atomic red as she realizes her situation and everyone was looking at her with various expressions. She swiftly sits down and stares at floor, refusing to meet anyone's eyes out of embarrassment.

"…Wow, that is so…" Haruna coughed into her fist with deep blush as her eyes shift sideway, "A-A-Anyone else want to go next? Asuna?"

"Um, I only make him a little older, that's all." Asuna scratched her cheek and it went on for a little while as some people share their stories. There were some common stories ranging from aging, threesome or x-some, gangbang, roleplaying and so on while some admit that they don't have one.

"Y-Y-You talked Naruto into doing that?!" Haruna gaped at Belle dumbfounded, "Really?!"

"I was just curious…" Belle fidgeted under their stares, "I have to persuade him for few days."

"…You won." The artist stumbled back to the front in daze, "You just won…"

"…Belle, why not furry?" Jasmine whispered to the said woman.

"Again, I was just curious and I want to try it out for once." The French girl muttered.

"And…?" The Arabian princess whispered.

"I kinda like it." Belle replied softly and the princess blushed madly.

"We will hold the kinky stories off for next meeting or you can swap it after the meeting." Yachiru bashed her gravel, "What's next…" She read the clipboard, "No one is pregnant yet so we'll skip it for now." Some grumbled, they have been trying for a while and few want to be first while other just wants to start a family. "Ah, it's time to open the floor for proposals. If someone wants to make a proposal, speak up now."

"I want to set a proposal for sex month." Mercedes quickly raise her hand up high in air, "It'll be like theme week but all sex for one whole month! Naruto can send his powerful bunshin out to do his work while he stay home with us for one whole month, doing nothing but fuck us all silly for thirty to thirty-one days."

"I seconded!" Kurono-Uzumaki Kurumu perked up.

"Same!" Lilith Aensland-Uzumaki's hand shoot up in air with almost two-third females, the rest appeared to be shellshocked by Mercedes' sudden proposal.

"The motion is carried." The smiling loli shinigami hammered, "Sex Month is approved and will be discussed in the next meeting." She wait for someone to make a proposal but no one say anything and she hit the table with her gravel. "The floor is closed." She looked at her clipboard again, "Before we adjourn the meeting, we have some announcements…Uzumaki Wives magazine is looking for some petite models for a photo shoot, preferring flatties…"

"How in world did this magazine get through is still beyond me." Asuna sweatdropped, she was glad that the magazine is limited to Uzumaki clan only because it was mostly pervy and smut inside.

"There will be voting for theme week so please cast your vote in before Friday next week." Yachiru said, "Ravel want me to remind everyone to start pack their swimsuits, few changes of clothing and proper supplies for three-day beach retreat this weekend. That is all announcements we have for now. The Wives Council meeting is now adjourned, thank you for attending."

"What time is it now?" Buttercup stretched her arms out annoyingly.

"…Time for Naruto to come home." Lori Loud-Uzumaki looked at her phone and the females stared at each other for a moment before they all scramble to the entrance in attempt to be second person to have sex with Naruto.

"I-I-I hope Naruto-kun will be okay after that…" Yuzu stay behind with beads of sweatdrops.

* * *

"I'm home!" Naruto entered his main house as he slip his shoes off and he feel the ground rumbling before a mob of his wives run toward him, screaming something about cumshots. "…Not again." The blonde hokage deadpanned before they all dogpile on their screaming husband.

* * *

 **And that end the second chapter of MHWH: UE?! Love it? Hate it?**

 **Wow, Naruto's harem has a council and we just got a little peek into how it work. At same time, we just found out a bit and heard some dirty stuff from cumshots to kinky stories…Some that even shock the rest of wives like us. Wow, just wow.**

 **What else will we see? Will we learn more about their lifestyle? Who'll make appearances and will we get spoiled by some certain things? Let's find out next time!**

 **Reason why I can't write (Blank) harem: Trap Harem and Reverse Trap harem…Um…**

* * *

Mumei stare at a paper in his hand with heavy sweats before he look up to the screen, "Um…I'm sorry…If you looked at some of my stories…" He gestured at his profile on monitor, "You'll see that I really don't do yaoi, slash, whatever you call it here, beside supporting LGBT characters…" He scratched his head nervously, "Again, I'm sorry." He looked at his paper again, "And for Reverse Trap harem…By that, you mean tomboy or butch? Any harem can have tomboys or butch and it's pretty much same thing. If you want them to look more like a guy, Naruto won't even show an interest in them."

"Why is this guy talking to empty air?" Naruto looked at the person weirdly before he look at tomboy/butch character, "You know something, man?"

"Nah, wanna go on a date?" Tomboy/butch character looked at him.

"Sorry, I'm not into dudes." The blonde shinobi scratched his head awkwardly, "I'm straight. Sorry again."

"…FUCK YOU!" Butch/tomboy punched him harder in stomach before she storm off and Naruto cough roughly in ball on ground.

"Yeah, it won't work out." Mumei said, unawake of events that take place behind him. "Again, sorry!"

* * *

 **I think that's all I can say for now…Thank you for your time to read it.**

 **Please leave reviews and feedback here. The flames will be tossed into boiler.**


	3. Why What! PT 1

**Thank you for the reviews and feedbacks.**

 **Double Update! Plus news! I'm still on hiatus as we are speaking because I kinda get part-time job (Short-term) and projects on other side but I have both good and bad news.**

 **Good New (1): I'm going on a WORLD TRIP! I have save up a lot of money and you have no idea how much effort I have to put into the budget for everything from food to place but I finally have done it. I just bought the first ticket to other country at cheapest price that I can find. That's right! I'm going to Europe first then to two or three Asia countries! Whoo-hoo!**

 **Bad New (1): I'm going on world trip…Which mean the hiatus will be very long than I thought…But hey, I'm doing it for one of my dreams!**

 **Good New (2): I have a friend who will update the stories in my place while I'm gone. I haven't give him the flash drive yet since I'm still writing some chapters (Little at a time because of work and projects) but when I'm gone, he will upload the chapters that I will finish at this time.**

 **Special Announcement: From now on, please check my profile frequently for status or any change.**

 **Some questions won't be answer to avoid the spoilers and if I miss any, sorry!**

 **People who want list: Y-Y-You want me to make a list of what appear to be close to over million to billion female, including Semi-OC, OC and few more? Oh hell no! I'm not gonna write this loooooong list! Nope! Nope! If you want to know who's in, it's EVERYONE! Any female character you name, they are already in.**

 **Dafix: That's up to your imagination, May can be this granny character or young version…Or is there two to more May Parker? Hmm…**

 **This chapter is short, more like an omake chapter in between.**

 **Warning: May contain spoilers (Story and harem members for a certain fic) and many contents (From normal stuff to taboo).**

 **Most characters might be OOC but I'm trying my best.**

 **Enjoy the third chapter of MHIWH: UE?!**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or anything mentioned in this story.**

* * *

 **Chapter 3: Why what?! Pt 1**

* * *

A big yawn escape Naruto's lip as he shuffle through some workpapers in his Hokage office, his wives have wear him out once again and he still have no idea why they all were screaming about cumshots. "And people think it's wonderful to have ultimate harem." He exhaled, they really have no idea what's it like when you have a hugeass diversities harem with so many types and what he have experienced.

With a ultimate harem, it's sometime hard to get in mood when one or more wives decide to jump him and same thing can be said when he's in mood for a certain activity with a certain girl, this person won't be in mood for it. It'll take a while and some works to get both party in a right mood.

It's also really suck when it come to anniversaries and dates because sometime he forget about them…But lucky, Ravel always remind him and he don't know what to do without his wonderful manager-slash-wife. She really have knack for that kind of thing like he does with presents and other things and she really take pride in managing harem as the head manager. Of course he doesn't let Ravel know what he bought for her.

"Good thing I'm hella rich to buy all presents for everybody." Naruto glanced at a largest scroll, labeled 'presents', next to his desk. Hey, he loves to spoil his wives as much as he can because they deserve it. He can think of more but he push it out of his head so he focus on his work.

* * *

"Hehehe, that is perfect!" A evil giggle catch Naruto's attention as soon as he walk into a random living room with a water bottle in his hand and he turn to the owner before a sweatdrop form on his head, "They will know the ultimate despair! Hehehe!"

"Junko-chan, please don't tell me you're trying to bring despair to everyone again?" Naruto looked at Enoshima-Uzumaki Junko with deadpan expression.

"Oh, hiya, darling!" Junko lob her head back to him with a bubbly grin, "How was your work? Do you want to fool around and use some ultimate sexual skills on me?" She pop a button off her shirt to reveal the valley of her cleavage, "Baby, I'll dress up like…"

"Good, and don't try to change the topic." He deadpanned, "Are you trying it again?"

"…What if I am?" She poked her cheek with tilted head and her husband pinch the bridge of his nose with a sigh.

Sometime it really sucks to have homicidal wives because you don't know if they would try to kill some innocent strangers for their own reasons. He recalled how he met some homicidal women, hell he even saved some of his future wives from them at this time and he manage to talk them out of attempt murders from time to time.

"Junko-chan, what did we just talk about that?" Naruto sat down next to his wife with a headshake.

"Don't worry, darling, I won't kill anyone you know." She scoots onto his laps with a charming smile, "Just a group of bandits and some enemies. Mind if you toss some death-row prisoners in for me?"

"You know my answer." He deadpanned at her, "Always no."

"Aw, no fun." Junko pouted childishly, "I just want to show them the true despair and how useless the hope is."

"Hope is not useless." Naruto replied, "Without hope, the…"

"I know, I know, spare me the speech." Her head lean against his chest, "Despair cannot exist without hope and vice verse. Blah, blah, blah. They are opposite, yet in harmony…" She grinned up at him, "Like us. You are the only person I truly love. I love you, my hope."

"And I love you too, my little despair." He chuckled lightly.

"…C-Can you say it again?" Junko draw an small circle shyly on his chest with her index finger.

"I love you, my little despair." He said and she snuggle up against him with a small squeal.

"You know what, I'll hold Killing Trials off." She whispered, "Let me dress up and have some fun in my bedroom, my darling."

"…Yes, honey." Naruto suddenly stand up, carrying her bride style as they leave the living room to her bedroom.

It's really awesome to have homicidal wives because they can be so cute when they become docile and get pretty crazy in bed.

* * *

"Naru-chan, there you are." The blonde hokage glance up from his book to see a busty girl in her twenties and she have fiery hair tied in pigtails, wearing a white button-down blouse with red short skirt. "Onee-chan has been looking for you. Where were you?"

"Hi, Ami-onee-chan." Naruto smiled at his older sister, he has three biological sisters and he's middle child along with his twin sister. "I was with Junko-chan."

"Doing what?" Ami plop next to him as her young brother scratch his head sheepishly, "Oh, I see…" She suddenly grabbed his shoulders, throttling him right away. "Why don't you come to your Onee-chan?! I know how to relive my little brother better than anyone else!" She thrust her large breasts forward at his face with stretching arms, "Come here and drink your Onee-chan's milk like we used to when you were little!"

"H-H-Hey, don't bring this up." Naruto's face turn red, "You know that I was too innocent to believe that all girls can make milks because kaa-chan was feeding Mito at this time…A-A-And you don't produce milk, you know that!"

Sometime it really suck to marry your relatives because they would bring up some embarrassing stories about you or show off some photos to everybody else when you don't want anyone to see it. That lead to some inside jokes among his wives and some won't let him live it down.

"Aw, I miss these days when you were so innocent and always cling to my side." Ami pulled him into a tight hug with a pout.

"I may not be innocent as much as I was but I'm still at your side." Naruto wrapped his arms around her waist, nuzzling against her body.

"…Hai, that's right." The older sister smiled down at her brother, "I'm glad to be married to my cute little brother." She pecked his forehead several times and before Naruto know it, his older sister lies back on couch in a seducing pose with her blouse half-open to expose her orange lacy bra-cladded cleavage. "Bro, come and play with your Onee-chan." She gave him a charming smile, mixed with lewd.

"…Hai, Onee-chan." Naruto grinned dumbly.

It's awesome to have relatives as wives because they know how to push your button faster than anyone else.

* * *

"Date, date, date." Nowi singsong happily as her arm swing with Naruto's hand, "I'm going on a date with husband! Husband and me on date."

"Take it easy, you're gonna tear my arm off." Naruto chuckled at her as they walk into a store.

"Okay!" The Manakete grinned beamingly, hugging his arm tightly as she glance at some items from clothing to trinkets and Naruto can hear some whispers.

"Why is this girl dress like that?" A man whispered to someone else, "Isn't that illegal? I mean, she look underage."

"Maybe he's one of these people, you know?" A woman whispered back, "Lolicon."

"Maybe, but she don't look over twelve or a legal adult." The same man said, "That's way illegal. Should we call someone?"

"Actually, she's older than she look like." A villager whispered to them.

"No way!" Both man and woman gasped in shock, "She barely looks like ten!"

'Must be merchants from outside…' Naruto sweatdropped.

Sometime it's really suck to be married to loli because some appear to be underage and to make it worse, some have child-like personality. Because of that, some people who don't know Naruto or his loli wives assume that he was really into young girls or report him to someone else, only to be more embarrassed when both parties found out about everything and it sometime make him feel a little like he's a criminal here.

"Look, Naruto!" He turned to see Nowi skip up to him in a white flowing sundress, "Does it look pretty on me?" She sways her dress around with a beaming smile.

"Hai, it does." Naruto smiled with a nod, "You're way cute and pretty in this dress."

"Thank!" Nowi glomp him with a happy giggle, "I wuv you!" Her husband laughed at her comment.

It's really awesome to have loli wives because they can be so cute and innocent enough to make you forget about bad things out in the world. There are other things but Naruto don't want to go there for now.

* * *

Naruto stare blankly at a sight in front of him before he turn to Starfire, Blackfire, Jean Grey-Uzumaki and Mystique with raised eyebrow. "So…" He jabbed his thumb at destroyed stalls and debris littered all over a ruined street, "What happened?"

"Eh, um…" Jean scratched her cheek with her index finger sheepishly as the other tried their best not to look into Naruto's eyes, "…We had a spar?" She said lamely.

"And it got out of hand, hehehe." Blackfire nodded rapidly with sheepish giggle.

"Ah, another spar, huh…" Naruto turned back to the street blankly with sweatdrop, 'I wonder how much ryo I have to pay in damage this time?' As soon as he thought it, She-Hulk flew through two houses in front of him, following by Powergirl and his head dropped.

Sometime it's really suck to be married to super-wives because they are either heroes, villains or whatever side they are on and they tend to fight each other over a certain scenario then it'll get out of hand. Most of time, the 'spar' always end up with many damages and he lost count at how many time he have to pay but one thing he know is that he paid so much ryo for these messes.

"…We'll make it up to you when we get home." Mystique turned her head to her husband, "We can even wear our costume."

"And we can use our certain abilities!" Starfire blushed with a grin.

"...I'll meet you all in one hour after I take care of this thing here." The sweating blonde hokage blushed.

It's really awesome to have super-wives because they are so gifted in bed and it's so kinky when you add superpowers and costumes in it, not to mention that some can go on longer! It's kind odd that they always want to make it up to him after their 'spar' but he just push it out of his mind for now since it's one of things that you don't want to question.

* * *

"Oh, Naruto-kun, what are you doing?" Naruto looked up from his opening scroll to see Mashiba-Uzumaki Kumi.

"Hey, Kumi-chan." The hokage grinned at his wife before he seal few ramen bowls, "I'm just packing for my mission."

"A mission?" Kumi frowned worriedly, "Um, what kind of mission and when will you leave?"

"It's just another kage meeting and it'll take place in Iwagakure so I have to leave in two days." Naruto replied.

"Oh, so it's not another dangerous mission?" She exhaled out then she pause for a moment, "But then it's you so it'll get dangerous."

"Hey, not all my missions always blow up into something big." He chuckled lightly before he look at her with a smile, "If it does, you know I'll take care of it like always."

"True." Kumi muttered, "But it won't stop me from worrying about you."

"Gomen." Naruto scratched his head with a small sheepish grin.

Sometime it really suck to be married to civilians because he always feel guilty about making them worry when he go out on his mission, due to his job, and at same time he'll be worried about them sometime because not all of his wives have special ability.

"It's okay." She waved it off, "I'm kinda getting used to it."

The blonde shinobi glance at her, "Tell you what, how about I do something for you when I get back as an apologize for worrying you."

"Anything?" Kumi's index finger taps her chin.

"Anything." Naruto grinned.

"Well, it've been a while since we have a date and some little fun playing a doctor game." She smiled as her blushing husband grinned goofily.

Sometime it's awesome to have normal wives because there's something about them that stand out among his unique wives…Not because they tend to bring out their work uniforms, nope, not at all! There are other things that he would say more about that but he push it out to focus on his wife in front of him.

"Ah, and we can visit Ryou-nii." She clapped her hands together with beaming smile, "He said that he want to see us again for a small family dinner."

"Oh, kami…" Naruto paled at the mention of his brother-in-law, her brother is way too scary for a boxer with no charka. He shudders at the memory of Ryou beating his opponent one inch to death the day that Kumi told him about their engagement. Another shiver runs down his spine when he hear Kumi giving her brother a call behind his back to tell Ryou about the plan.

* * *

"This one is deaged pill, right?" Naruto held up a red pill with his left hand then he look at a black pill in another hand, "But what is that? I've never seen this one before."

"Oh, it's something new that the Uzu researchers come up with." Nico-Uzumaki Robin smiled, Uzu researchers is a group of Naruto's wives who like to research and invent something from any form of sources like technology to magic, mostly for the Uzumaki clan in many certain area. "It's called E-Cock." Naruto raised his eyebrow at her as she still have smile on her face, "All it does is increase your cock in size, some think it'll be twice the size and some think quintuple the size."

"…And you want me to eat them for our sex?" Naruto said slowly.

"Of course, I always want to know what it's like to be pound by shota you with large member." Robin replied, still smiling.

Sometime it really suck when his wife suddenly have a specifically fantasy and sometime it make him feel so uncomfortable but they always somehow talk him into doing it.

"Then after that, we can do whatever you want to me." Robin pressed herself up against him, "We can do this thing you like, you know the one where I dress up like a…"

"…Bottom up." Naruto suddenly swallow them up with red face.

It's really awesome when they get a fantasy because they always fulfill his fantasy after their love-making activity and there are so many things for each wives that he want to try out or do with.

* * *

"You know what?" Naruto drawled to himself, "It's fucking awesome to have a ultimate harem." He take a glance around a largest room, revealing that he was surrounding and almost bury under countless slumbering wives, all in their slumber attire or birthday suit. It's one of these night where his ultimate harem all sleep with him together for a night and he was glad that no one decide to get freaky with him or he will never get any sleep.

"Naru-chan…Not there…" The blonde shinobi glance under him to see Diane the giant, also revealing that he was lying right middle in her valley of cleavage as she drool in her sleep and he sweatdrop at his giant wife's dream.

Naruto look back up to the high ceiling, "It doesn't really suck to have an ultimate harem when you're loved by so many and everyday is fun…" The sex doesn't play a part in this, Naruto blush heavy, nope, not at all.

"Liar…" The hokage glance at Hera as she mumbles in her sleep and he wonder if she can read his mind. Naruto just shrug mentally before he falls asleep.

"Naruto, let's fuck!" Someone cried out.

'Stay sleep, don't open your eyes, stay sleep!' Naruto wisely kept his eyes closed to avoid another sleepless night.

* * *

 **And that end the third chapter of MHWH: UE?! Love it? Hate it?**

 **We just saw a bit of Naruto's ultimate harem and it look like he kept change his mind each time he try to come up with a con.**

 **What else will we see? Will we learn more about their lifestyle? Who'll make appearances and will we get spoiled by some certain things? Let's find out next time!**

 **Reason why I can't write (Blank) harem: Villainess Harem…**

* * *

"Bwahahaha!" A villainess laughed evilly as her death-ray machine come to alive, "Soon, the empire will be destroyed by I, the great…"

"Hold it, hon!" She turned to see Naruto racing up to her with a stern glare, "I thought you said you change your way!"

"I LIE!" Villainess hit the button, firing the laser up in the air.

"What have you do…" Naruto was about to say something but he hear some evil laughter in background.

"MWAHAHAHAHA! YOU ALL WILL DIE IN FRONT OF ME, THE SECOND VILLAINESS!"

"OH, COME ON!" Naruto threw his hands up furiously, it's so fucking hard to keep his eyes on his villainess lovers! Why did he decide to have a villainess harem?!

* * *

 **I think that's all I can say for now…Thank you for your time to read it.**

 **Please leave reviews and feedback here. The flames will be tossed into boiler.**


	4. I'm Going To Be What!

**Thank you for the reviews and feedbacks.**

 **But don't worry, I'll write a bit in free time during the hiatus.**

 **Special Announcement: From now on, please check my profile frequently for status or any change.**

 **Some questions won't be answer to avoid the spoilers and if I miss any, sorry!**

 **Now from onward, the chapters will be NSFW for couple reasons…There will be bit dirty scene in between but it won't be full, more like catching/walk on someone/spying/etc, getting starting and/or at ending bits. Why? Just because.**

 **Warning: May contain spoilers (Story and harem members for a certain fic) and many contents (From normal stuff to taboo).**

 **Most characters might be OOC but I'm trying my best.**

 **Enjoy the fourth chapter of MHIWH: UE?!**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or anything mentioned in this story.**

* * *

 **Chapter 4: I'm going to be what?!**

* * *

A soft groan escape her lip as Kuchiki-Uzumaki Rukia slowly open her eyes, sit up in her bed groggily and she take a sideway glance at Naruto snoring away next to her. She bop Naruto's head lightly and the snoring blonde vanish in a smoke, revealing to be a kage bunshin, as the petite woman get off her bed, straighten her white nightgown out. Rukia yawn out before a strong wave of nausea hit her and she clutch her stomach with one hand on her mouth. "U-Ugh, dammit…" She makes haste out of her room and hurriedly walks down the hallway quietly as she can be since it's too early for anyone to be up. She reach the nearby bathroom and was about to run inside but she halt in her track with her eyebrow raising slightly as soon as someone stumble into her sight.

Ravel Phenex-Uzumaki, in her purple nightgown, also look at her puzzlingly with two hands on her stomach and they just stare at each other in front of the bathroom's door until the blonde girl speak. "Um, a-a-are you going to use the ba…" Suddenly, green tint appear on their faces and they both suddenly barge into the bathroom right straight to the toilet, fling seats up then vomit in together.

"R-Ravel, um…" Rukia gazed at her shakily after she wiped some remaining biles off her chin, "Are you…?"

Ravel give her a bashful nod with light blush, "You too?" She receives a shy nod from the blushing petite shinigami, "Um, may I ask you when you co…" The blonde devil can't say it out of embarrassment.

"…W-W-When we were discussing about my schedule a while ago in your office…" Rukia mumbled with red face, "A-And Naruto show up with our breakfast then…"

"R-Really?!" Ravel blushed heavily with a gasp as the blushing shinigami widened her eyes at her, "M-M-Me too!" Their blushes become deeper as they lean against the toilet in silence until Rukia mumble under her breath.

"S-S-S-Stupid Naked Apron Month…"

"Y-Y-Yeah…" The blushing devil muttered, "…H-H-Have you break the news to Naruto?"

"N-N-Not yet." Rukia replied, "I-I'm just nervous and it's hard to tell him because things always come up or get in way."

"Ah…" Ravel nodded lightly, "…D-Do you want to tell him together?"

"Yes, that should make it easy for us." The shinigami chuckled lightly, "I-I can't believe we're going to be mothers."

"And I also can't believe that we both might give birth on same day." The blushing devil said and Rukia agree with her.

"OUT OF THE WAY!" Before they both know it, Sophitia Alexandra-Uzumaki shove her head in between them then vomit into the toilet. Another voice catches the young women's attention.

"Oh, come on!" Rukia and Ravel look up to see Jessica Jones-Uzumaki leaning against the doorway with one hand on her stomach, "I NEED TO PUKE SO FUCKING BAD! I'M GONNA KILL NARUTO!"

"…Say, didn't they also join us on this day?" Ravel slowly turns to Rukia.

"Yes, along with the others…" Rukia slowly meet her eyes, "…Do you think…"

"…I would say impossible but it's Naruto here we are talking about…" Ravel replied. It look like they have to find the rest and check them out before they can break the news to their husband.

* * *

"Am I pregnant?" Kurotsuchi stared at four women with pinkish tint on her cheeks and she slowly take a sideway glance at other girls next to her then she turn her eyes back to the group as she place hand on her stomach. "Y-Yes, I am…" She said lowly with timid tone, adjusting her eyes away from them.

"Oh, me too!" Tionishia clapped her hands together gleefully, "I hope it'll be twin! How exciting is that?"

"Hehehe, Foxy's babies are inside me." Toga-Uzumaki Himiko giggled insanely, rubbing her stomach with dazzling blush.

"Wait, we're all pregnant here?" Gwen crossed her arms with corked eyebrow, glancing at Alma Wade-Uzumaki, Tinkerbell, Uraraka-Uzumaki Ochaco, Pamela Isley-Uzumaki and Roll. "…Great…Wait…" The goth girl looked at Roll, "How can a fembot get pregnant?"

"I-It's complicating, I'll explain to you later." Roll whispered to her embarrassingly.

"I can't wait to see Naruto's face." Janna Ordonia-Uzumaki elbowed Krystal with a snicker and Star Butterfly-Uzumaki laughed out loud.

"I'm certain that Naruto will faint right away." Nami Uzumaki chuckled lightly.

"Guys, I think Ochaco's broken." Thalia Grace-Uzumaki jabbed her thumb at shellshocked girl as she floating up in air while mumbling 'baby' all over again.

"Well, you can't blame her." Rukia glanced up, "It's not everyday that a group somehow get pregnant on same day after we had reverse-gangbanging sex with Naruto." Almost everyone blush at the memory.

"S-So how will we play that?" Jessica pulled Ochaco down, gazing at the group and they stare at each other in silence, aside the gravity girl's mumble.

* * *

"Naruto-kun must be in kitchen by now." Rukia paced down the hallway with Nami, the girls decide to split up to find their husband and take him to a private room so they can break the new.

"Mmm, he's probably pigging out." Nami rolled her eyes and the shinigami snorted at the former pirate's comment. As soon as they get closer to the kitchen, a familiar noise reach their ears and they halt in their trail then they slowly peek into the kitchen.

"D-D-Darling…" Ayame sat on the edge of kitchen counter with moans as Naruto held her right leg up above their heads while he thrust inside the moaning waitress furiously, "D-D-D-Don't take too long or you're making me late for work…"

"O-O-Ooh, maybe we can take a day off today." Naruto kissed her with a smirk, "I-I-I'm sure your dad will understand…" They suddenly make out.

"…D-D-Do we have to wait until they finish up?" Nami blushed at the sight.

"W-W-We can come back later…" Rukia glanced at the blushing navigator before they walk away from the kitchen with red faces.

* * *

The girls were discussing about their pregnancies in a random private room until the opening door grab their eyes and they stare at Ochaco enter by herself. "Is Naruto behind you?" Pamela asked the gravity girl.

Ochaco stare at her confusingly for a moment before she jolt lightly with widen eyes, "Oh, shoot! I forget!"

"How can you for…" Rukia notice Ochaco's crumbled tank top and messy hair as the blushing girl adjusting her right strap up, "…You ended up having sex with him, didn't you?"

"…Y-Yes…" Ochaco poked her index fingers timidly, "H-He's still busy. I'm sorry!" Most girls just either facepalm or shaking their heads at her.

* * *

"Ravel, are you sure about that?" Krystal asked as the group waited near foyer of the main house, "I mean, we're going to spring something big to him as soon as he gets home."

"We have no choice." Ravel crossed her arms with a deep sigh, "Everytime we try to tell Naruto, we always end up finding him having sex, ending up having sex with him then forget why we was there in first place or something else get in our way…"

"Like his man cave." Sophitia said, "Almost make me wish that we shouldn't give him man cave in first place." The wives decide to surprise Naruto a 'man cave' after they built the Uzumaki compound so he can have his own space.

"Cave?" Thalia scoffed, "More like…"

"I'm ho…" Naruto enter the house before he blink at his wives as he close the door behind him, "Hey, girls. Um, were you all waiting for me?" He asked curiously.

"Y-Y-Yeah…" Roll shifted her weight to her left leg, "W-W-We want to…" She looked down with blush and most girls can't help but to look at anywhere away from their husband.

"…W-Well, it've been a while." Naruto sighed to himself, slowly unbuttoning his pant.

"I-I-I-It's not that, perv!" Thalia cried out with deep blush, her fellow wives also blushed madly. They can't blame him for thinking that since the sex month is not over yet for few more days.

"Oh!" Naruto quickly fastened his pant, "Sorry, I just…"

"It's fine, it's fine." Nami waved it off with red face, "W-We want to tell you something."

"What is it?" The hokage glanced at his wives, wondering why they kept fidgeting around.

" **Here."** Naruto looked down to Alma as the loli ghost push a pregnancy test stick into his hand before she look up to him with a innocent-yet-wicked smile, **"I'm mommy now."**

"Wha…" Naruto glanced between the stick in his hand and Alma bewilderedly.

"Dammit, Alma!" Jessica huffed at the smirking phantom as she shoved her stick against Naruto's hands, "You were supposed to wait until one of us gives the signal!"

"Wha…" The shinobi looked at the second stick in his other hand.

" **You'll stall or chicken out like before."** Alma replied with a sway of her dress, her hands behind her back. The blushing wives hand their sticks over to Naruto, grumbling at Alma for jumping the gun.

"Wha…" Naruto stared at sticks in his hands then he look up to his wives with widened eyes, "Wha…"

"We…" Gwen gestured at herself and the rest, "All are pregnant."

"At same time." Star grinned widely.

 _Thud_

The wives stare at their fainted husband before Rukia speak up, "That went well."

"YOU'RE ALL PREGNANT?!" They jumped up at voice behind them, causing them to spin around to see Sawatari-Uzumaki Mitsuki as the gaping maid stare at them with widened eyes before she suddenly run off down the hallway, "OOH, I GOTTA TELL EVERYONE!"

"…Fifty bucks that everyone will race here and jump Naruto unstoppable until he knocks them up." Janna poked Naruto's cheek with a snickering giggle.

"That's a sucker bet there." Nami deadpanned as they listen to the loud 'WHAT' cries throughout the compound.

* * *

Rukia beam to herself, holding Naruto's hand as they walk on the street while some villagers greet them and Naruto tilt his head at her with a light smile. "You're in pretty good mood." Naruto said.

"Of course." Rukia nodded happily, "I get to be first to go on baby shopping with you." They had draw a lottery and she won the first turn. "And at same time, I'm exciting that we're going to be a parent." She rubbed her stomach happily, "Together."

"Yeah, me too." Naruto rubbed his head with a chuckle, "I still can't wrap my mind around the fact that I'm going to be a father…And the fact that I somehow knocked eighteen wives up in one day." He whispered the last part lowly.

"But you're already a father." Rukia gazed at her husband's face, "You adopted the girls and become stepdad to some. Plus, there are future daughters…"

"Y-Yeah, but I end up married to my adopted daughters, stepdaughters and future daughters." Naruto sweatdropped.

"True, but you have stepsons anyway." Rukia replied.

"Right, but it's kinda different." He scratched his head, "Because I'm going to be present at the birth. I mean, I love the boys but sometime, it make me wonder what it's like if I was there at the beginning, what it's like to raise them from birth, all the stuff I can do with them up to now. Now I get a chance to experience something like that. You know?"

"Yes." The shinigami hummed in deep thought, "I think I can understand what you're saying. It's something new…" She glance at her stomach as she realize something, "Say…You think it's Ichika in there?"

"…I-I-I don't know?" Naruto blinked rapidly at her stomach before he look up to the sky as he rub his forehead annoyingly, "I really hate time-traveling crap."

"You're not the only one." Rukia patted his arm with a soft chuckle, "Let's not thinking about it now." A baby store appears in their sight, "Let's thinking about what we should get for our baby."

"Do you want to look at clothing first?" Naruto asked and the petite shinigami give him a nod as they enter the store.

"Wel…H-H-Hokage-sama, R-Rukia-sama?" The cashier stuttered with widened eyes as he stared at his leader walk in with one of his wives, "W-W-What bring you here?"

"Well, we're here to do some shopping…" Naruto rubbed his head with a chuckle as he take a sideway glance at his wife, "For our baby together."

"B-B-B-B-B-B…" The stuttering cashier blinked rapidly, still stunned that his leader and war hero is present in his store.

"Where do you keep the baby clothing?" Rukia asked him with a smile and the cashier wordlessly point at the back as the couple walk past him. She smirks at her husband, "I wonder how he will react when you bring the others here. Maybe he'll faint like you did."

"I-I-I didn't fainted, I passed out!" Naruto blushed.

"Same thing." The smirking shinigami rolled her eyes at him and the blushing shinobi grumble something under his breath. Something catches her eyes when they reach the clothing section and she grabs it, spinning around to Naruto excitingly. "Naruto, what do you think of that one?" It was a green onesie with a cartoonish bunny on it, "Chappy the Rabbit for little one!"

"Oh, it looks cute." Naruto chuckled lightly, he wasn't surprised that Rukia would try to push bunny-theme stuff onto their unborn child and try to make it a favorite animal like the shinigami. "Does it come in different colors?" Naruto looked through the stacks, glancing at Rukia as she beam at the onesie in her hands. "Since we may go with bunny-theme, do you want to buy some stuffed bunnies?"

"YES!" Rukia nearly shriek out of excitation before she quickly covers her mouth with embarrassing blush and Naruto just laugh. They kept looking through the baby stuff and purchase anything that they like while several villagers notice them, spreading the words about the couple. The village would later lose their mind when they find out that Naruto bring other seventeen wives in row and discover that they were all pregnant on same day.

* * *

"Seriously, how is that possible?" Kiba sat with Naruto and their friends, "I mean, how can you knock almost twenty chicks up in one day? HOW?!"

"Beat me." Naruto rubbed his neck with sheepish chuckle.

"Anything is possible with Naruto." Shikamaru drawled.

"Yup." Choji munched on his chips, "But I'm kinda surprised with expecting mothers. I was expecting someone else to be first to have your child."

"Like who?" Naruto asked curiously.

"Hinata, Sakura, your mother and sisters, Ayame or Mikoto." The Akimichi heir answered.

"Why my mother?" Sasuke raised his eyebrow at Choji, "The other, I can understand but my mother?"

"Naruto once told me that he have a big crush on your mother when we were six." Choji said.

"…" Sasuke slowly turn to Naruto with a twitching eyebrow, "Oh, really? How come you never mention that?"

"To be fair, you and the other boys went crazy on me when you all found out that I was dating your mothers." Naruto chuckled nervously.

"For good reason…" Sasuke rubbed his forehead annoyingly, "For good reason."

"Aw, don't be like that, son." Naruto smirked at the twitching Uchiha, "Your mother is happy and that's what's important to us."

"Still not happy about that." The Uchiha heir grumbled and the group just drinks their alcohol.

"Hey, this chick over there is so hot." Kiba gestured at a woman at the bar with his head, "I'm gonna…"

"Oh, it's Xiaomu, one of Naruto's wives." The Nara heir replied flatly.

"Damn you, Naruto!" Kiba's face smashes down on the table with groan and the chuckling hokage just rub his head.

* * *

Himiko shiver lightly as the doctor apply gel on her bare growing stomach and she glance up at Naruto next to her with wide grin, exposing her canine fangs. "Foxy, I'm happy you're here."

"Of course, I won't miss that for anything." Naruto smiled.

"Yup, but I wish you come here all bloody and tattered." Himiko pouted childishly, "You always look good with blood all over your face. Very sexy." Her husband just sweatdrop at her with deadpan stare, it's good thing that he's getting used to his yandere wives and their odd fetishes.

"O-Okay, it's up now." The trembling doctor try his best to ignore Himiko's blood-obsessive ramble as the machine come to live and he scan her stomach. "By the way, do you want to know the gender?"

"Yes." Himiko take hold of Naruto's hand with a hum, "You think it'll be boy or girl?"

"I'm fine with whatever it'll be as long as it's healthy." He squeezed her hand with a smile.

"Ah, there it is." The doctor pointed at the screen as he examine it, "Ah, their hearts appear to be very healthy."

"Their?" Both parent blinked.

"Yes, it looks like you will have quintuplets." The doctor smiled at them, "four girls and one boy. Cong…"

 _Thud_

"AH, HOKAGE-SAMA!" The doctor cried out as his leader fainted.

"Yay, five foxy babies to spoil." Himiko giggled, her hand still hold onto Naruto's hand as the doctor kept crying out for the hokage.

* * *

Naruto wipe some sweats off his forehead as he look at competed crib, "Finally, that's the last one. Whoever comes up with it should have made it easy to assemble instead of gribbish crap." Naruto grimaced at crumbled instruction paper in his hand, "Sadist bastard."

"Naruto." The said man glanced over his shoulder to see Shizune, Lucy Heartfilia-Uzumaki, Temperance "Bones" Brennan-Uzumaki, Grayfia Uzumaki and Elsa of Arendelle. He spot something in their hands and it was… "We're pregnant." Shizune smiled sheepishly at Naruto as they held their pregnancy test sticks up.

"…" Naruto slowly turn to the crib before he drop his head down with a deep sigh, "Dammit, now I have to assemble five more cribs…" He's glad about the news but at same time, he loathes the inventor of cribs.

* * *

 **And that end the fourth chapter of MHWH: UE?! Love it? Hate it?**

 **Boom! He's going to be a father but it's gonna be crazy because almost over twenty women are pregnant and some are cray-cray than before! Poor guy, how can he deal with it?! It look like he's going to be so busy juggling with pregnancy-hood and sex life with Ultimate Harem since almost everyone want baby so badly! Let's pray for him, pray for him!**

 **What else will we see? Will we learn more about their lifestyle? Who'll make appearances and will we get spoiled by some certain things? Let's find out next time!**

 **Reason why I can't write (Blank) harem: Mother Harem…**

* * *

Naruto glance at every woman who claims to be his mother, "…Um, it's like I'm dating Kushina's kage bunshin with henge." It turn out that all of his mothers were very similar, only difference between them are their skin tone from light to dark and hair color from white to black. "…Yeah, that is so weird…"

* * *

 **I think that's all I can say for now…Thank you for your time to read it.**

 **Please leave reviews and feedback here. The flames will be tossed into boiler.**


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